Fact or Fiction: Are Platonic Friends Real?

Situation:
Is there such a thing as a platonic relationship? Can men and women really be just friends?

She Says:
YES! YES! YES! I wholeheartedly believe that every woman should have a meaningful friendship with someone of the opposite sex; caveat: he should not be someone who wants to smash her. It is great to have someone to run all my crazy questions by regarding men, and to not be judged. I think the key to being in a platonic relationship with a member of the opposite sex is to truly value and respect what you have with that person. If you have a hidden agenda, or hopes of it becoming something more than a friendship, you are creating gray areas within the boundaries of the relationship.

A mutual friend of K’s and mine stated, “You guys have such a rare platonic friendship; I mean, you have never had sex.” This is true; we have never had sex, never kissed, never….well, done anything that was more than friendly. And quite honestly, the thought of doing so disgusts me—really, it does! YUCKERS! I am content and satisfied with my relationship with K as it is.

K and I have attended the same school since 6th grade; the poor guy even followed me to Temple University, lol. Our friendship has a solid history, and it isn’t worth messing up. It has been tested by past girlfriends of his, who were uncomfortable by our relationship. In my opinion, it was more of a result of their insecurities than any flaw in my relationship with him, or any boundary having been crossed by our actions as friends. 

But I digress. To summate my opinion, men and women can successfully be platonic friends, as long as both parties involved respect the boundaries that have been set, and stay out of the gray area.

A

He Says:
The question, “Can men and women be just friends??” has invoked discussion for a long time. Many people question the validity of the concept of “platonic friends” because they understand the emotional differences between the male and female species. It is sometimes assumed that a man always has ulterior motives to get to “smash time”. It is also assumed that when a man shows concern for a woman, he is automatically interested in marrying her. As a cat who honestly cares about the well being of other people, my past life was filled with consistent occurrences of people mistaking my true friendship for my being in love with them.

Ladies, every guy that shows interest in you is not looking to wife you. And gentleman, most women don’t want to smush you—no matter how hard you try. Learn to build that relationship! I honestly believe that platonic friendships/relationships are completely necessary. See, your dudes are going to give you that false sense of reality; but a woman will keep you in check and tell you when you are acting up, or when you are doing something wrong to your girl. I learned one very important thing from an old head I know, and that is: the best way to truly learn how to treat a woman is to ask a woman!

Luckily I have been able to build a true platonic friendship with someone that I can now call a sister. We know that our friendship will never be anything more than what it is; and I honestly believe that neither of us would ever cross that line. We have had people ask “When is smash time?” or “Are you sure ya’ll aren’t in a relationship?” We have even had people compare us to Dre and Syd from the movie Brown Sugar. But at the end of the day, A and I have embraced the fact that most friendships will never be as deep as ours and we have no need to take it to the “forbidden level”. We understand the boundaries, and in turn, that allows us to have a successful platonic relationship.

P.S. I don’t disgust her. LOL

K