FDLF’s Top 5 R.Kelly Songs of All Time

Situation: Reader ‘Carrie’ sent an email stating that she and her bf were having an argument about the top five best R. Kelly songs ever. She issued the challenged to KG and I to develop our own top 5 list of R. Kelly songs. Here we go!

She Says:
Let me start by saying “thanks” to Carrie! *insert sarcasm here*

This post was the most difficult to write of all the ones I’ve penned to date. Robert Sylvester Kelly is a musical genius and it was extremely hard to choose just five songs. I wanted to approach this by breaking it down into categories: the top 5 inspirational songs, top 5 scutter songs, and top 5 love songs – but that’s cheating. So instead, I tried to stick to the task. Here is my list (in no particular order):

1. "I Can’t Sleep Baby (If I)" – This song features a classic 90s R&B beat, and is drenched in the desperation of a man who wants his lady back. What’s not to love about it?! Fav line: “Oh sometimes a man can say things that he really don't mean./Well I'm sorry baby!/Bring your lovin' back to me..”
2. "Down Low" – This does not qualify as one of R.Kelly’s best lyrical efforts, but it is indeed a classic. The video featuring Fancy (Garcelle Beauvais) and Mr. Biggs (Ron Isley), with an ending scene of R. Kelly laying in the desert after being beaten is (I’ll say it again) classic. The song itself has a sultry beat and R.Kelly’s slow, breathy delivery showcases his masterful ability with musical narration.  Fav line:”Secret lovers is what you wanna be./While making love to him girl you're silently calling on me..”
3. "Elsewhere" – I love this song because it’s the perfect song to send to an ex. The lyrics and delivery are saturated with regret and pain –the precise emotions you feel after a failed relationship--when you realize it’s too late to salvage it! Fav line: “Things that I started feeling the day that she left/things that I slept on/things that I should have accepted/things I expected and the things I neglected..”
4. "12 Play" – The title track on his debut solo album was essentially a play by play of a sexual escapade. There’s no need to showcase my fav lyric, however I will instruct everyone to make sure it is on their ‘scutter’ playlist on the iPod.
5. "It Seems Like You’re Ready" – This early R. track is yet another scutter playlist essential! I really don’t know what else to tell you. Fav line: “Temperature’s rising/and your body's yearnin' for me./Girl, lay it on me..”

Honorable Mentions: I Wish, Ignition & Ignition the Remix, When a Woman’s Fed Up, Step in the Name of Love, Just Like That, You Remind Me of Something, Happy People, Radio Message, I Believe I Can Fly, Feeling on Yo Booty,  and The Greatest Sex

He Says:

In honor of the “Pied Piper”, I have been challenged to create a list of the top 5 R. Kelly cuts (I’m so old that I call songs cuts LOL) of all time. Mr. Kelly has done wonders for people in the bedroom and in the classroom (don’t act like ya’ll didn’t sing “I Believe I Can Fly” at your elementary or middle school graduation). So, here is my list in order of greatness, along with my favorite lyric from each song. Feel free to agree or disagree!

1. “It Seems Like You’re Ready”- This is classic 90s R. Kelly music! Taken off the 1993 “12 Play” album, Kells laid down the perfect track that lands in the perfect place on the album for you and your lady to enjoy and get things started. “Your body is my playground…Let me lick you up and down.”
2. “Bump and Grind”- I am trying not to be biased in my choices, but two of the greatest sex songs of the last 20 years happened to come from “12 Play”--which speaks to its greatness. Bump and Grind is the type of song that is relatable across generations; even the old heads say they play it for their women. It has the type of staying power that will keep it eternally on people’s ‘best of’ lists. “My mind is telling me no... But my body, my body’s telling me yes! I don’t want to hurt nobody… But there is something that I must confess…”
3. “Down Low (Nobody Has to Know)”- This song details the plot of a cheating man perfectly. This was the birth of the new age R. Kelly where he found a way to revive Ron Isley from the dead as “Mr. Biggs”. It is made both for people who love the forbidden fruit, and for anyone who just loves to hear about it. “Secret lovers is what you wanna be. While making love to him girl, you’re silently calling on me." (You killed ‘em with that one Kells!)
4. “Step In the Name of Love”- Anyone who finds something wrong with this song is just a hater. R. Kelly created a track that allowed you, your momma, your grandma, and your Pastor to get their two step on. I’ve seen many people dance like they thought they were from Chicago while grooving to this song. It’s just an all around feel good track that will probably be played at every Crab Feast for the next couple of decades.
5. “Feelin’ On Yo Booty”- R. Kelly once again puts it down for those looking to get down. There is talent in being able to make ass sound vulgar and angelic in the same song by playing a soothing instrument in the background. On another note, the video for the song allowed all young men to realize what Lil’ Kim had been hiding for so many years! “Now your body's got me feeling like spending. With a backroom I could come to live in.”

Honorable Mentions:
Trapped in the Closet Parts 1 thru 747- This song could have probably been turned into a book with all the twists and turns that were involved in the story.

When A Woman Loves- I know this is a new track, but this may be the one where R. Kelly is showcasing his best vocal talent ever.

They Say:
And P.S:  Watch out for those golden showers! (You knew we were gonna throw that in there at some point, right? *shrug*)